Welcome to a place none of us ever wanted to be: grief. I wish you weren’t here. I wish I wasn’t here. But here we are, so we might as well be here together.
This series is just me in my yard, raw and unedited, talking about some of my experience with grief since the death of my daughter, Libby, in July 2018. I cussed a little in the videos, and all I can say about that is: it could have been worse. You’ll hear a lot of birds twittering; it’s the hummingbirds, busy in the honeysuckle. There’s yard noise and neighbor noise and it’s not perfect at all. It’s just my life, as it is, now.
I’m going to talk about the overwhelming complexity of grief, and a bit about the neuroscience that explains why it’s so overwhelming and complex. I’m going to talk about the toxic cultural narratives around grief and loss, including grief shaming. I’m going to talk about post traumatic growth. I’m going to share the best resources I’ve found when it comes to understanding grief and finding our way through. And I’m going to talk about what’s helping me rebuild my life after it was blown to pieces.
For each episode, there’s a short blog like this one, a video that’s under 10 minutes, some journaling questions, and most episodes: a poem.
You’re welcome to use the comments to journal if you’d like. The videos and the journaling questions are really just a jumping off point for any conversation you’d like to have.
Thanks for being here, even though it sucks.
“Traveler, your footprints
are the only road, nothing else.
Traveler, there is no road;
you make your own path as you walk.
As you walk, you make your own road,
and when you look back
you see the path
you will never travel again.
Traveler, there is no road;
only a ship's wake on the sea.”
—Antonio Machado
(translated from Spanish by Mary G. Berg and Dennis Maloney)
Self Compassion by Kristen Neff
The Grieving Brain by Mary O’Connor
It’s Okay That You’re Not Okay by Megan Devine
Resilient Grieving by Lucy Hone